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 Beyond the forest (Chapter 1)
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Joined: Sat Apr 30, 2016 3:40 pm
Posts: 1
Mon May 30, 2016 11:15 pm

"Ember!" I heard a familiar voice say. "Yes mom?" I replied as I slowly trudged out of bed.

No response.

I ran downstairs and almost trampled my mom. She had her hands on her hips and was giving me a death stare. "Where were you? I kept calling and calling you down for supper but I got no answer!" She shouted. "Sorry, I was sleeping." I said under my breath.

After lunch, my mom left to go do laundry in the basement. I left her a note that I would be out bike riding. 

I grabbed my bike from our grubby little shed and mounted it. I was off. The wind brushed through my straight, black hair, making it untider than before. I started daydreaming and didn't realize where I was headed. Before I knew it, I had bumped into something. 

I struggled to get up. Cuts and bruises were on my arms and legs. When I finally fully regained conciousness, I realized I hit a tree. I had wandered into the forest. I frantically looked for my bike and found it tangled in a bush. It had bends everywhere and had a flat tire. "Great, my bike is broken. I should head home," I mumbled to myself. I looked around me and realized I had basically rode into the middle of a forest.




 Re: Beyond the forest (Chapter 1)
new

Joined: Wed May 11, 2016 8:01 pm
Posts: 270
Mon Jun 06, 2016 6:32 am

Pretty good so far! Keep it up!

-Dragoncrown485




 Re: Beyond the forest (Chapter 1)
new

Joined: Thu May 14, 2015 1:52 pm
Posts: 20
Sun Jun 12, 2016 1:44 pm

Really good! Keep writing, this will be a great book when you're done!

 

                                            - amberdolphin1094




 Re: Beyond the forest (Chapter 1)
new

Joined: Fri May 13, 2016 2:29 pm
Posts: 11
Wed Jun 15, 2016 12:56 am

pretty good just add more details. good use of vocabulary like it a lot




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