Post Work in Progress for Peer Review


Welcome to Write It, the home for young writers. Post your works-in-progress and get feedback or give your opinion on your peers’ creative writing. Try a step-by-step writing workshop, then publish your writing online.

You’ve probably noticed we’ve made some changes to the boards! Find the boards for Underground Railroad historical fiction, Science Explorations, Scholastic News, and more right here.

Looking for our boards dedicated to favorite series, authors, and causes? You'll find them on THE THE STACKS. Head on over for the Buzz Board, Harry Potter, Save the Planet, Goosebumps, and more!
   [ 1 post ] Average score:  

YES!! or NOO!!
A. Yes 75%  75%  [ 3 ]
B. No 25%  25%  [ 1 ]
Total votes : 4
Author Message
 How does it sound?????

Joined: Mon Nov 07, 2016 1:36 pm
Posts: 4
Wed Nov 09, 2016 1:59 pm

DO you like my story?  yes or no It is still a work in progres.  BTW.


Hello.  Welcome to my life.  If you are thinking about closing this book, please read my entire for today. 

JK!!  WELCOME!!  Today, my mom said, “Would you rather go to Williamsburg for Thanks Giving or, stay home while our whole family comes?”  

I have always wanted to go to Williamsburg!  It is so historical and so YEAH!  I so said, “UMMM, why did you even ask!  YES!!!” 

Mom was like, “I thought you’d rather see your cousins.” 

I was like, “We can see them anytime!” 

She just laughed and said, “Well then, it’s a date!”  Me and her hugged and jumped around and around.  We were so happy!

She said we were leaving November 22 and we would leave November 31st.  I am so exited!  I could SCWWEEEE J!!!! 


  Williamsburg here I come!  YES!  WOHHOOO! 




 Monday November 7 NOOOOOOOOOOOO

NOOOOO!  Guess what happened on the monkey bars at rescues?  I fell and broke my wrist!  Yeah!! Both!  I am at the hospital now while the doc looks at my wrist x ray and ask me what color I want my cast.  I said cheetah.  So, he pulled it out of the box and put my wrist up.   I am so sad and that kinda crushed the trip to Williamsburg!  I am sad.  I can’t put my socks on alone and I can barley draw.  I can’t eat with a fork so I eat with a baby spoon. 

Here is what I can draw at the moment:



Very sad, right?  I want to be healed.  I want to be a dancer and dance but with a broken wrist I can’t even move my arms to pull myself up!  UGH!  Williamsburg, I will have to kiss you good by for a while.L WAAAA! 



When I went back to school an our ago, I had a crowed and a lot of sharpies shoved in my face! 

My BFF Kala was like, “Does it hurt?” 

I said, “Idk, I can’t fell it.” 

Kala said, “Oh.”  

I had all sorts of other weird questions that I got from some of my friends.  Like, “Can I sign it?” and “How bad is it?  OH, NO WHAT HAPPENED?”  I was like, “Yeah, and very bad.  I fell off the monkey bars.” 

So today has been a disaster and I’m sure later it will be worse at home and when we have health n’ meds I will be even more questioned!  UGH!  Anyways the bell just rung so it’s time to go to health n’ meds.  Wish me luck! 

Helthe n’ meds notes:

When having a broken arm or wrist make sure you treat it with a pillow and hold it still as you sleep.  If you have a removable cast make sure to put ice on the arm or wrist when you take off then put on fastly and make sure it is on correct. 

Secret info no peeks


Anyways I am going to car poll now.  There is a very, very long line and my mom is at the end!!  UGH!  So I just walked all the way to the car poll back line to hop in the car.  Mom turned it around and then took a look at my wrist, and said, “YOU BROKE BOTH??” 

I said, “Yes, I told you right?”  I looked at my text messeges to MOM 3> 3> and there was the text and it said, Unread in the little box.  Here is what I said.

                                                             MOM 3> 3>                                                              i

Hey mama.  I am at the school hospital getting my wrist looked at.  I fell of the monkey bars at school and now I have to get a cast on it. also, I have to go back tomorrow and get them checked again. 3>  I broke both just letting you know.





Ok love u.






“Yes I did say it to U!”

“Oh well.”

“I love u mama.”

“U too.”

Then she turned up the music and it was my fav song, No.  I burst out singing.

“My name is no, my sign is no, my number is no, need to let it go, need to let it go, na to I to the no no no!” 

Then me and mom laughed because I was all trying to move my wrist.  HAH!



Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
   [ 1 post ] Average score:  

PRS © 2008 PRS Team