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Is this a good poem? Or should I write a new one?
Poll ended at Sun May 14, 2017 1:36 am
Yes, this is a great poem! 0%  0%  [ 0 ]
This is a good poem. 0%  0%  [ 0 ]
You could do better. 0%  0%  [ 0 ]
No, you should start over. 0%  0%  [ 0 ]
Total votes : 0
Author Message
 I need feedback on this poem pls :)

Joined: Fri May 12, 2017 1:37 am
Posts: 1
Fri May 12, 2017 1:36 am

The "Perfect" Life

Perfect parents who give you everything.

2 perfect brothers who protect you.

1 perfect sister to be a permanent best friend.

A perfect dog who has been loyal and everyone loves.

A perfect house in a perfectly small town across from the perfect little church.

A perfectly big wrap-around porch and sports equipment in the yard.

Seems perfect right?

Well, inside that window of perfectness exists a girl with thoughts swirling in her head like she’s trapped in a tornado.

She lays on the floor with headphones blasting the 2012 top hits to try and drown out the nagging voices that tell her she’s not good enough.

She stares at the medals displayed on the crystal blue walls and thinks

“if only I had more of these- that would be perfect”


If perfection was able to be achieved then it wouldn’t be called perfection, would it?

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