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   [ 12 posts ] Average score:  
Author Message
 john cena/rview me back please
visitor

Joined: Thu Dec 22, 2005 12:45 pm
Posts: 3490
Tue Dec 20, 2005 3:11 pm
Do you like action? People hurting each other. This is a dream I had.

I am John Cena a wwe proformer I have to fight the big show.

I come out I have my intrence. He comes out he has his entrece.

The announcer say this is a hell in the cell match is scuelded for one fall it is for the wwe championship. The bell rings I am standing across from the biggest athlete in the world he is 7’0 feet tall an is five hundred and four pounds he is a beat he is huge.

I have never faced him before I don’t really know any of his moves we lockup I put him in a side head lock. He Irish whips me I still have my side head locked on we fall to the ground. You can see he is starting to get frustrated He picks me up and gives me a suplex I let go my head is throbbing form getting the suplex I get up he give me an Irish whip I come back and he boots me in the face I get back up he runs at me I give him a ddt.

I get out of the ring I get a chair I slam it on his head. He is knocked out I clime out of the ring again. I kick the cell door open I clime to the top and taunt him and make him look stupid he gets up climes out of the ring he walks out of cell and starts climbing. He gets to the top and runs at me he close lines me I get up he runs at me again this time I give him a ddt I give him a you cant see me he gets up I go to give the fu bomb he reverses it and gives me a choke slam I am out cold and he starts tautening me and makes me look stupid. I get up and he boots me in the face and he starts taunting me some more. I get up an to his surprise I drop kick him I give him another you cant see me the crowed is going wild he stands up and is stunted finally he turns around and I get the fu ready he I got him he is up on my shoulders in fu position I give it to him we fall thru the top of the cell you can see he is out cold I cover him the reef get down he stars counting

1….2….3…. the bell rings I am in shock I am the wwe champion I climb out of the ring an walk out of the cell an clam my belt I am all fired up know I jump in to the crowd and am listening to the crowd and am thanking them for all of their support I go back stage and thank the g.m. and my family and I leave the arena and go parting the I wake up. I find out it was just a dream.



THE END



 RE: john cena/rview me back please (from Diona, Author Panel)

Joined: Mon Sep 11, 2006 8:44 pm
Posts: 83
Tue Dec 20, 2005 3:11 pm
Hi John,



Thanks for posting your piece. I'm afraid my reply will be a bit short; the site will begin a freeze tomorrow and I really want to respond to all the pieces on this board before then. But if you'd like more detailed feedback, feel free to post again once the site is back up and running (I believe this will be within a couple of weeks).



Your story has the potential to be very exciting, but the way it's written is very confusing at times. My suggestion would be to start off by describing the experience of being at the WWE match. Tell us what you hear, see, smell, think, feel, and taste. Instead of simply saying that you make your entrance, tell us what kind of music is playing, how the crowd reacts, and whether you feel nervous as you approach the ring. Draw out every moment before the fight begins for as long as you can, to build suspense.



When you describe the fight itself, use short, descriptive sentences. Remember that not everyone who reads this is an avid WWE fan, so we might not know (I sure don't!) what an "Irish whip" or a "suplex" is. Feel free to explain the types of moves these are.



At first I thought it was strange that you never described feeling any pain; but since this is a dream you're recounting, that makes a lot of sense. We usually don't register physical pain in our dreams.



And if I were you, I wouldn't mention anything about the fact that this whole thing WAS a dream until the very end. A bit of a surprise ending. :)



Thanks again for posting!

Diona



 Re: john cena/rview me back please

Joined: Mon Jan 23, 2006 7:52 pm
Posts: 5
Mon Jan 23, 2006 10:48 pm
Just like the last person said it needs more discription. There was this thing that we did last year where we were writing a story and then you act like time freezes and your the only one that can use your senses. So, you say what you hear, smell, taste, touch and all those. Also I dont know what a fu bomb or a suplex is. I don't know if your trying to abbreviate or whatever But, theres some spelling errors. I would suggest a very catchy intro. I like yours because it's asking me a question and i want to answer all of them and before i knew it im at the end of the story. By the way when you slam the chair on his head might want to explain what it looked like. Was there gore? BYE!!!



 Re: john cena/rview me back please

Joined: Mon Feb 27, 2006 7:45 pm
Posts: 4
Mon Feb 27, 2006 7:52 pm
i've gotta agree w/ the other 2. i don't watch wrestlin so i don't know wat the heck is an irish whip. u mite wanna put like details bout it and stuff.



 Re: john cena/rview me back please

Joined: Tue Nov 13, 2007 4:50 pm
Posts: 15
Mon Dec 17, 2007 11:14 am
John Cena OMG!!!!! I'm your #1 fan!!! I can't wait till you get back to raw and get the WWE Championship back!!! I'm kinda glad Y_2_J is back though because he can get the championship from Randy! Because Randy dosn't deserve to be Champ! He dosn't understand the meaning of Champ! But as soon as you get back I'm sure your going to be champ again because you are the meaning of champ! Sorry about your arm see you soon! Bye Champ!:smileywink:



 Re: john cena/rview me back please

Joined: Fri Dec 26, 2008 9:34 pm
Posts: 1
Tue Feb 10, 2009 3:14 pm
mysterio619



 Re: john cena/rview me back please
rookie_visitor

Joined: Tue Nov 02, 2010 1:21 pm
Posts: 9
Thu Nov 18, 2010 11:43 pm
Well john cena is pretty cool but the thing that sucks is that like the goup nexus is controlling him especially wade bareet i wonder what he will do cus he is the refferi fro the match wade barret vs randoy orton



 Re: john cena/rview me back please
new

Joined: Wed Oct 23, 2013 10:16 pm
Posts: 173
Fri Oct 25, 2013 8:55 pm
oh my gosh I love wwe



 Re: john cena/rview me back please

Joined: Sun Nov 20, 2011 5:57 pm
Posts: 110
Sun Nov 24, 2013 9:30 pm
cool dream



 Re: john cena/rview me back please
new

Joined: Wed Jan 08, 2014 6:07 pm
Posts: 10
Wed Jan 15, 2014 10:46 pm
john cena do u want to be my friend cause i just made an account like a few days ago and i only have one friend i am kind to everyone but i am not kind to people who r mean to me or people who annoys me but i will be kind to u cause u r my new friend so if u want to be my friend just text me back.OK



 Re: john cena/rview me back please
new

Joined: Thu May 15, 2014 8:05 pm
Posts: 1
Thu May 15, 2014 8:41 pm
Hey John, I just read about your match. Good for you. You just beat Big Show and became WWE champ. Randy Orton couldnt do that.



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