Post Work in Progress for Peer Review

Announcements


Welcome to Write It, the home for young writers. Post your works-in-progress and get feedback or give your opinion on your peers’ creative writing. Try a step-by-step writing workshop, then publish your writing online.

You’ve probably noticed we’ve made some changes to the boards! Find the boards for Underground Railroad historical fiction, Science Explorations, Scholastic News, and more right here.

Looking for our boards dedicated to favorite series, authors, and causes? You'll find them on THE STACKS. Head on over for the Buzz Board, Harry Potter, Save the Planet, Goosebumps, and more!
   [ 3 posts ] Average score:  
Author Message
 The Secret
regular_contributor

Joined: Sun Mar 22, 2009 11:56 am
Posts: 4314
Tue Jun 08, 2010 5:40 pm
 Oooh, sounds dramatic, right? But yes, it should be in humor. Why? Well, read the darn story and figure it out! By the way, all states, cities, and names are 100% FAKE! :D
 I looked up at the sky and basked in the glorious light shining upon me. "Ahhh...." I said, feeling peaceful. I was sitting on my porch step, sipping ice tea and admiring the warm, lazy Summer days, the sun beating on Sunville, a small oceanside town on the shore of California.
 All of a sudden, my best friend Scott ran at full speed towards me. I tried to hop up from my seat on the porch, but it was too late. Scott tackled me.
 "Scott!" I shouted. "What's wrong with you?" I added, frowning. "Come on, Addie, it's Summer, not bummer!"
 I groaned. "Um, could you GET OFF OF ME?!?!" I asked angrily. He looked down and realized he was still on top of me. "Oh yeah," he said laughing. I forgot. I don't know why, considering you're too flabby to be a porch!" he added. He chuckled, climbed off of me, and ran. He opened our gate and ran into the backyard. "Ooh, you're gonna get it!" I screamed and ran after him.
 I was right on his heels, so I gave him a flat tire. He toppled over, screaming like a girl. "What was that for?" he asked. "Oh gee, I don't know," I said in anger. "Maybe because a certain SOMEONE called me flabby!"
 "Dude, I was joking. And I didn't come here to wrestle. I came here to tell you a secret," He said, smiling.
 "Ooh, a secret! Spill!" I commanded, flopping on the grass beside him. "Nah, it's too late now," he teased.
 "Tell me!" I shouted. "No, thanks. But thanks for the offer," He joked. He ran out of my backyard and onto the hot sidewalk. "Get over here!" I shouted.
 But he already ran away.
 
 The next day, I sat on my bed, wondering what Scott's secret was. "Does he like Barbies? Nah, probably not" I said. "He.....Um......Doesn't want to be friends anymore? Wait, that's like, impossible!" I added. I like talking to myself, you see. My puppy Elmo bounded over to my bed and struggled to climb up it. "You silly puppy!" I said, laughing as I picked him up and plopped him on the bed. "You can't do that yet!"
 I looked at Elmo. "Do you think.....Scott....Likes me?" I asked. Elmo just wagged his tail and barked happily.
 I've always thought Scott was cute. Sometimes I hoped he'd come to my doorstep with a dozen roses and ask me to be his soulmate, you know, like you see on T.V. Hey, a girl can dream!
 As I thought about it, my cell phone buzzed, signaling a text. I looked at the screen. "It's from Scott!" I shouted. I opened my phone. The text read:
 
Hey, my phone is dying. IM me. TTYL!
 
I smiled. I hopped into my desk chair and turned on my instant message.
 
Luv2dance: Scott, u there?
Football4me: No.
Luv2dance: Haha, very funny. What u wanna talk about?
Football4me: IDK
Luv2dance: Then why did u ask to IM me?
Football4me: I'm bored. :P
Luv2dance: So wats ur big secret, huh?
Football4me: Oh, I don't know if I should tell ya. :D
Luv2dance: Are you pulling my leg? There is no secret is there?
Football4me: No there is.
Luv2dance: K, then tell me.
Football4me: Alright.
Luv2dance: So, what is it?
Football4me: Here it goes...
Luv2dance: Yes?
Football4me: Okay....
Luv2dance: SPIT IT OUT, SCOTT! What is wrong with u?
Football4me: Wait....tell ME a secret.
 
I stared at the screen for a long time. I turned to see Elmo still on my bed. "Should I tell him?" I asked. He wagged his tail. "I guess that's a yes," I said, sighing.
 
Football4me: U there?
Luv2dance: Ya, and here's my secret.....I.....Like you.
Football4me: Ew.
Luv2dance: Excuse me?!?!!
 
I frowned. This was so not my fairytale ending.
 
Football4me: I don't like u that way. At all! :D
Luv2dance: Well, SORRY! Now tell me your secret, Mr. I don't like you.
Football4me: Here it goes...
Luv2dance: Hey, stupid! I don't have all year! What's your secret!?!
Football4me: Hi.
 
I screamed. Literally. What the heck was he doing?
 
Luv2dance: WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?!?!!
Football4me: hahahaha.
Luv2dance's computer seems to be smashed into a jillion pieces. Please wait until she can get a new one.
 



 Re: The Secret

Joined: Thu Dec 02, 2010 5:44 pm
Posts: 5
Fri Dec 03, 2010 5:04 pm
thats so funny: the secret hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaahhahahahahahaha

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahhahaaha-------
PALISGIRL3 HAS SEEMED TO LAUGH SO MUCH, SHE ACCIDENTALLY LOGGED HERSELF OFF. PLEASE TRY AGAIN.

Message Edited by Write_It_Moderator on 12-13-2010 06:47 PM




 Re: The Secret
frequent_vsitor

Joined: Fri Dec 25, 2009 9:19 pm
Posts: 452
Sat May 21, 2011 8:44 am
Ha ha tht was funny



Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
 
   [ 3 posts ] Average score:  


PRS © 2008 PRS Team