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   [ 10 posts ] Average score:  
Author Message
 Will you be a Hero?
frequent_vsitor

Joined: Wed Nov 18, 2009 9:30 pm
Posts: 411
Thu Jul 08, 2010 3:12 pm
I have a lot of songs stuck  in my head that talk about heros, so I decided to write one. It's similar to a song by Superchick.
 
He gets bullied every day
Hair puulled, glasses brocken
Yet no one has a word to say.
When he goes home he thinks of death
Wants to leave this nation
But you could be his salvation.
 
Will you be a hero?
Will you be a savior?
If you do, it could change a life forever
 When you're a hero
You will first stand alone
But when the day is done
An obstacle has been overcome
 
She always feels so lonely
Avoids their eyes, often cries
Feeling like the one and only
And 'though no one gives her a glance
You could at least give her a chance.
 
Will you be a hero?
Will you be a savior?
If you do, it could change a life forever.
 When you are a hero
You will first stand alone
But when the day is done
An obstacle has been overcome
 
He has a typical teenage life
In trouble with friends, has temptations
With low grades, but goals that are high
At home, his baby brother wants to be just like him
But should he be?
He could change the life a boy who's only three.
 
Will you be a hero?
Will you be a savior?
If you do, it could change a life forever.
When you're a hero
You will first stand alone
But when the day is done
An obstacle has been overcome.
 



 Re: Will you be a Hero?
visitor

Joined: Sat Jan 09, 2010 6:08 pm
Posts: 113
Fri Jan 14, 2011 5:51 pm
tooooooooooooooooooo coooooooooooooooooool!!!!!!!!!!!
 
summers15, girl by day,hero by night,and a saturday fan at heart



 Re: Will you be a Hero?
frequent_vsitor

Joined: Tue Mar 02, 2010 6:45 pm
Posts: 277
Fri Jan 21, 2011 8:40 pm


_writermage_ wrote:
 
He has a typical teenage life
In trouble with friends, has temptations
With low grades, but goals that are high
At home, his baby brother wants to be just like him
But should he be?
He could change the life a boy who's only three.
 


I like it, but I have a problem with one little line. :robothappy: You could change the line that I highlighted in red. You could say, "He could change the life of a boy who's only three." Otherwise I didn't notice any other mistakes. Keep writing. :robotwink:

????    ??????????????????????????

??  ????  ??    ?      ????????????  ???

  ??  ??  ???    ??????????  ???  ?  ???

    ??    ??  ?    ????  ???????????  ????

      ????    ???????  ????????????????




 Re: Will you be a Hero?

Joined: Fri Jul 08, 2011 10:01 pm
Posts: 3
Fri Jul 08, 2011 10:38 pm
Nice! The thing the first and second refrains it sounds a lot like though is Three Days Grace's "Bully."



 Re: Will you be a Hero?

Joined: Wed Dec 07, 2011 12:17 pm
Posts: 1
Wed Dec 07, 2011 12:22 pm
hi party



 Re: Will you be a Hero?

Joined: Tue Oct 25, 2011 3:47 pm
Posts: 144
Wed Jun 06, 2012 10:42 pm
will you enter my song contest??!!??!!?!



 Re: Will you be a Hero?
new

Joined: Fri Jan 04, 2013 9:52 pm
Posts: 1
Fri Jan 04, 2013 10:04 pm
Word! That was an awesome poem. I really felt for it.



 Re: Will you be a Hero?
new

Joined: Mon Apr 15, 2013 4:47 pm
Posts: 11
Tue Apr 16, 2013 3:45 pm
Thats a good poetry or a song or whatever that was



 Re: Will you be a Hero?
new

Joined: Tue Apr 30, 2013 3:03 pm
Posts: 1
Fri May 10, 2013 11:39 pm
I really loved this poem/song, it was really heartfelt and pretty. At first i was sorta not feeling anything, but then later i got really in to it and re-read it. L-O-V-E-D I-T-!



 Re: Will you be a Hero?
new

Joined: Thu Sep 05, 2013 9:29 pm
Posts: 9
Sat Sep 14, 2013 9:43 pm
Speechless. ~Katie, Writer, singer, drummer, definateley NOT a songwriter, hopeless fiction fanatic and all-around awesome person~



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